The 4 People You Need
Who’s in Your Support Network?
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Everyone needs a support network. Life is full of challenges, decisions, and unexpected turns, and having a group of people to lean on can make all the difference. Your support network provides emotional stability, guidance, and accountability to help you navigate life’s ups and downs. It’s not just about getting through the hard times—it’s about having the right people to cheer you on, comfort you, challenge you, and help you grow.
To create and maintain your network, I suggest using a four-square model. In this model, you’ll assign two different names to each box, ensuring you aren’t over-relying on a single person. Each name should be unique across the boxes so that no one is playing too many roles. Here’s how it looks:
Cheerleaders
Everyone needs cheerleaders. These are the people who applaud you for even the smallest victories, like getting your shoes on the right feet! They provide unconditional support for everything you do, making you feel brilliant and invincible. Cheerleaders are essential for those days when you’re convinced you are useless, talentless, and totally incapable.
Comforters
Comforters offer non-judgmental support when you need it most. They will listen for hours, and agree with everything you say, no matter what. They will show up with wine, chocolate and a full box of tissues. They will bundle you in a cozy quilt and listen and listen and listen, as long as it takes to soothe you. Comforters are there to listen and support you—even if you change your mind completely during the conversation.
Critics
Critics are the people who help you think things through and identify potential flaws in your plans. They do this in a loving and constructive way, helping you to find better solutions, create foolproof strategies, or elevate your work from so-so to outstanding. Their feedback is invaluable when you’re refining your ideas or tackling challenges.
Confronters
Confronters are the ones who call you out when needed. They will ask you what you’ve done about the things you said you would do and hold you accountable. Confronters ensure you don’t hide behind excuses or procrastination—they push you to take action and stay on track.
Why a Support Network Matters
These people are lifelines, helping you navigate life’s toughest challenges. They’re the ones who support you in making hard decisions, recovering from disasters, taking care of yourself, and striving for greatness.
It is also important to have a second chart that shows who you support. Refresh your charts twice a year to ensure the relationships are still aligned with your needs and roles.
Your support network is right there to help you when life feels too overwhelming, and you need more help than they can provide on their own. They’ll stand by you, help research options, evaluate your choices, and ensure you show up for appointments or commitments.
What now?
Well, you might have discovered that you don’t have everyone you’d like to have at this point in your life, and that’s perfectly normal! Good news! Be sure to check out our follow-up article:
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What do you think? Do virtual friends hit the same, or do we need all 4 live friends too?? I know when my parents died I missed having live/local friends. No one to come over for coffee, or drop off a casserole, or mail a physical sympathy card. My virtual friends were amazing, but I missed the live-factor. The same for my business friends, or business mentor. What do you all think?